Many of the girls I work with have trouble falling asleep.
One girl said she was fine during the day, but as she is about to go to sleep she runs through the events of the day, thinking about whether what she said were appropriate, nice, or right. She said during the day she didn’t have the time or space to really think about that stuff but it all bubbled up in the evening. I suggested that she not think of things as ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ but rather as ‘just is.’
Fear comes when it is dark out
The girls all acknowledged that the fears tend to come to fruition when darkness falls upon us. One girl worries that her house will burn down. Another sleeps with her arms in close in case someone comes in to chop her arms or legs off. Another sleeps by her mom because her mom will be able to protect her if anything happens. Other fears: Someone sneaking in to through their window at night and earthquakes.
It’s easy to see fear in our world today
Sounds like a lot of fears for such young kids! I’m not sure I remember having trouble sleeping at that age. In my work with girls, I see a lot more anxiety in kids these days, and in parents too. I think it is because of our easy access to information all around us. And we perceive the world we live in from a place of fear. Some kids are afraid of getting diseases. Think of all those drug commercials on TV that we were never exposed to growing up. The side effects alone are enough to scare anyone!
Suggestions for falling asleep
1) Do some calming yoga poses like child’s pose or put your legs up against the wall
2) Go to your “special place” – a guided relaxation activity I do at the end of every class
3) Before bed write down all the things you are worrying about, tear it up.
4) Make sure you are off screens at least an hour before bedtime.
5) Don’t watch any scary movies. It can be tough to get those images out of your head! Or listen to drug commercials.
6) Imagine surrounding yourself with white light as a protective shield to keep you safe. I surround my car with white light if I am worried about it getting broken in to. It’s worked so far!
7) Some kids like to use apps like Calm and Smiling Mind. I have mixed feelings about this because I have read that it is not good to have your phone next to you while you are sleeping. So use your best judgment.
8) Take deep breaths. Can count for inhale for 4, hold for 7, exhale 8. Repeat 4 times.
What have you found worked for your tween to get to sleep at night?
Please comment below!
Zen Ya’all,
Kim
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